Friday, September 7, 2012

The Worst Thing About Being Poor

http://www.ihatemylife.us/story.html

Here is the story of a man who experienced homelessness.  Actually, 'experienced' doesn't seem to do a thing like homelessness justice.  Anyway, this man wasn't abusing substances or anything like that.  And he eventually managed to get another job and pull himself back out of homelessness.

Here is a quote from his website:  "The worst part about being homeless wasn’t living on the streets or being hungry, it was having my friends, or the people I thought were my friends, turn their backs on me."

As I'm writing this, I'm sitting on my sofa in front of the TV, having had frozen pizza and potato chips and sheet cake for dinner (small 'party' with just me and my girls--husband has guard duty this weekend).  My stuff is all safely ensconced under my roof, and I'll in all probability be sleeping here tonight, just like I have almost every night for many years now. 

Life is not perfect.  But it seems horrible that somebody would say that the worst thing about being homeless wouldn't be losing most or all of your 'stuff', or sleeping in less than comfortable surroundings, or going hungry, or not being able to bathe regularly, but that the worst thing would be the abandonment.

This is what it's like to be poor--except worse, I'm sure.  If I have to be alone, I think I'd prefer to be alone with my frozen pizza in my comfy house.  I have no idea what it's like to be homeless.  Don't want to know.  But I think a lot of poor people would understand what this gentleman is talking about.

It's hard, just being poor (not homeless), and watching the people in your life as they start disapproving of you and begin to distance themselves from you, finally to disappear from your life altogether.  Friends think they see a lack of motivation, or gross financial mismanagement, as they build careers, go on vacations, eat in nice restaurants, buy new homes and new cars and nice clothes.  You no longer have anything in common with them.  If you're lucky, only some of your family disappears.  You're now the 'lazy white trash' at reunions and holidays.  Clerks in stores, nurses in doctors' offices, and social workers in government agencies don't treat you the same way, because you haven't had your hair done or bought decent shoes, or because you're buying the cheapest items in the store, or because your children are on medicaid, or because you're unemployed.  One day you realize you're not all that welcome at church, and after several attempts at finding a better church, you realize you're not welcome at any of them.  You start to spend Sundays alone.

Then the next thing you know, there's a holiday, and you spend that alone, too.  Then there's another one.  And another one.  One day, you realize it's been going on for years.

And that is indeed the worst thing about being poor.


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